tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1709537690528523236.post3958289252311440852..comments2024-03-15T06:59:20.114+10:00Comments on in my view ...: mixed messages by mis leadersobakesanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13743339737847465926noreply@blogger.comBlogger3125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1709537690528523236.post-41870131967366573722012-11-14T04:11:54.270+10:002012-11-14T04:11:54.270+10:00I've seen those frost structures before, on la...I've seen those frost structures before, on lakes in northern MaineCharles Maclauchlanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16371804975922943864noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1709537690528523236.post-73972521868325758232012-11-14T03:25:46.243+10:002012-11-14T03:25:46.243+10:00Obekasan,
having gone through grief over lost one...Obekasan,<br /><br />having gone through grief over lost ones a few times myself now, albeit never as cutting to the core as losing my spouse, I have found that lots advice I got in grief counseling sessions and in help books I read was not helpful and in many cases even hurtful. That said, I found that raging at self-help book authors sometimes actually made me feel better so perhaps there is a silver lining there. <br /><br />This sort of thing where an author generalizes inappropriately is especially silly. Grief is intensely personal but I don't think that the realization that we ourself are the ones grieving and not the people that are no longer with us makes it any less burdensome. One can certainly grieve for the fact that the one you lost doesn't get to experience the joy and beauty that she could have. Not everything has to be selfish.<br />It is very good that she had the time with you that she had and it's good to think back of those winter days and other great experiences. I hope that even though you do not get to share the future with your wife, you will still be able to find new beauty in the world. It really sucks that she won't be able to be there with you in person.Jao van de Lagemaathttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04853597371091364769noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1709537690528523236.post-46774189929938120702012-11-13T21:30:38.849+10:002012-11-13T21:30:38.849+10:00Grief is so personal and subjective, I don't t...Grief is so personal and subjective, I don't think anyone can generalize it.<br />We all have to find, each, our own way to deal with it. <br />Mind you: not an easy task! But I agree entirely it's the only way to handle the pain and overcome it.<br />Hang in there, mate. Call if you need to chat, you know that.Noonshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04285930853937157148noreply@blogger.com