Back in 2006 Anita took me to a part of Koivusuo which was an excellent trip, and was about my first trip skiing. I'd had about 12 days ski experience at that time and so I was not required to pull a sled or carry much ... just cope and keep up. Suffice to say it was one of the most memorable ski trips I've had. Click the image below to take you to an old post on an old website for more on that story...
That particular day was substantially colder than this day (about a week after that date on the calendar).
The road in wasn't cleared all the way, so I had to ski the last few Km along the road leaving the car at a maintenance administration point off the side of the road (nobody was there)
So I put on my skis and headed down the road. Some snow mobile rider had been down there (probably from in that shed there and probably to check firewood at Hanhikoski) and so that made the trip a lot easier to ski (than the deep soft snow).
Today was just under freezing, about -3°C or something like that. There was little breeze and I quickly got down to just my fleece and shirt.
Ahead of me was this view:
and up at the top of the road there is pretty much were we parked the car on my first trip. Its about 4km to here from where I left my car this time.
The track entrance was far more "over grown" since last time but the heavy snow had bowed down trees and left a most amazing scene for me.
A quick (and shakey) look around
This picture is at that lump of snow bowing down a small pine that ended the above video ... more detail in this picture, but the video above provides context not had in a picture.
That snowmobile rider was really keen as this was quite tight going but I'm glad he "cut a trail" for me. So at the place where the forest got thicker (and the trail more or less got tougher) I decided to call it quits and head back. This is looking back at where I'd come (and yes those are only my ski marks).
Besides I knew that the weather was going to get "bad" meaning warm ... and snow sticks to skis like shit to a blanket in those conditions ... yes I know cos last weekend I had to walk home carrying my fucking skis.
Anyway the ski (well, pick and hunt a path) through that was beautiful and breath taking ...
On the way back I had my lunch beside this hut ... just staggeringly deep snow ... my skis are 2.1 meters long and I was still sinking about a foot deep with every step,
This "storage" of lumber had so much snow on the cover roof that if I got close enough to see down the crack to the bottom I couldn't capture the top but far enough back and it just looked like a mushroom ...
I'd previously checked the weather and knew that it was due to get rain (god help me, rain on soft snow in -1°C, what a shitfight) So it was about time to head back. Indeed knowing this is why I didn't press on the last 1.4Km from where I gave up to get to the destination.
So as I left my lunch spot it indeed (as predicted) started drizzeling on me ... you know, that annoying tiny stuff that just wets you after an hour or so in it. I wasn't getting "wet" without my Goretex coat on so I just stayed with the fleece (which is a little water repellent) but my pack got a nice layer of ice on it.
nice ...
So I packed my skis onto the roof, got in the car and came home to have a glass of wine and some cheese.
This is now my 5th Anniversary without Anita ... in a couple of years it will be longer without her than the time I had with her.
I find that its getting easier to actually deal with living, its either that I'm getting stronger at carrying it or the clarity of memory is fading. I can't be sure which. I would say that its now at the point where I can do most things and just have a background sadness at times.
Today I laughed at many lovely things and the simple joy of being out in such a beautiful place. Peaceful and alone. I skied well enough that I'm sure she'd be proud of me.
I hope you enjoyed the trip too.
Looks like a nice trip for you. We have had the mildest winter I remember. Today is 8 degrees Celsius, which normally would be in deep freeze.
ReplyDeleteUnbelievable it's been 5 years. I remember the shock when I first read about Anita from your blog, and kept asking how's that possible, she was so young! But life is fragile and unpredictable and sometimes out of our control.
Perhaps time does lessen the pain, or we have come to terms with the loss.
Glad you are doing well.