Thursday, 25 October 2012

Aspects of love

A question which often seems to go around is "what is love"

I dont want to try to rewrite the book there but perhaps just add some clarity on a point.

To me at least a significant part of love is trust, trust that extends beyond lending your material things. People often talk about giving of yourself, but what does that mean? Time? Energy?

To give the other person power over yourself is what I think its about.

As soon as you hear yourself say "you can't tell me what to do" it means you have not given that power to that person. So sharing power willingly with your spouse is to me a sign that you have a mutual love of depth.  Naturally that power should be in both people, you should also have that influence in your partners life too.

That you do not abuse this power is what keeps the love alive and growing. That you don't abuse the power is perhaps what others call "respect".

This has become part of what I call conscious knowledge (as opposed to unconscious knowledge) as I have reflected on what Anita and I had in our lives.

So perhaps a part of grieving is also learning.

I am glad that I am not learning along the lines of "you don't know what you have till its gone", for I can say that I did know well "what I had" and cherished it every day. So let me quote to you an important lyric from a song most will know:

love the one your with

and remember that the love you have is the most important thing you have.


Charles Maclauchlan said...

are those "bunny Ears" she was making? Love it

obakesan said...

Hi Charles

they exactly are ;-)

This was shot at our "engagement celebration"

She had just that sort of humor all the time. I guess you recall the bunny costume too :-)